Sunday, December 19, 2010

The future a.k.a The dreaded Where do you see yourself in five years?

Career. Most people have some kind of plan, a rough idea of what they want at least. But me? Not a frigging clue. I recently graduated my uni course, so I now have a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology and Criminology. Go me. But then it leaves wtf to do next year. The psych part of my course bored me and since I'd rather kill someone than do another unit of anything remotely connected to research or stats that means honours and fourth year are you aren't looking at a psychologist. And the crim part? Meh, more interesting so I might do something in that field in the future. But tbh im clueless. I have no idea what to expect or what to do.

What I would love to do would be to open my own little boutique bookshop, a nice little place with space to read thats tucked away from the brunt of the world. Maybe with my own book on the shelves. But it's a dream I'll likely never fulfill. The rise of ebooks and online shopping has crushed bookshops. Why bother going out to buy a book when you can buy it online or read it on ur kindle or computer? And as for having my own book on shelves somewehere? Who'm I kidding? I'm not that good.

Love life. Hell the idea of introducing my bf to my sis or Dad freaks me out so much. Like it will make it real somehow. He seems so hesitant to introduce me to his friends,which I can't help but overthink. Ugh too many thoughts bothering me but for now I think I'll just do my best to enjoy the ride and have some fun, after all It's about time this angel let her hair down and her horns jut free. This year? I plan to be naughty.

As for the future of my love life I hope that it's full of adventure and passion, trust and support. I hope that I managed to tick many things of my 'list' and add many more along the way. But most of all I hope I learn how to feel more than lust for a guy. I'm afraid I'll never learn to love completely. That I won't be hugely disappointed by sex or love because I learnt everything I know from romance novels or tv. The idea that nothing is as great as I've read about scares the crap out of me. I want the epic romance, I don't want my love life to be boring!

Family. My sister's pregnant. God the idea of a baby in the house makes me cringe. I find myself breathlessly praying that her n her man stay together forever because the idea of her moving back in and me losing my space to a nursery makes me want to commit some crimes. Anything to get out of the house :P My Dad and I managed to have our first civil conversation in over 6 months yesterday so maybe things are looking up there. Perhaps we can head back to having a relationship though I think our father-daughter bond is too damaged to ever be repaired. Still he's the only Dad I have so I gotta make the effort right?

Hopes and dreams. I'm thinking about writing a kind of Bucket List. Not that i'm dying or anything but since I really don't have many hopes and dreams I think I really should create something to aspire to. I don't want to just exist.

                                      ***                                            ***                                   ***
So what's on your bucket list? Plans for the future? Are you as scared of it as me?

Also I noticed I have a new follower. Hello!!!!

No comments:

Post a Comment