Sunday, April 17, 2011

The female thesaurus

So I keep seeing things about translating women... you know what I'm talking about, what women say and what they really mean. That kinda thing. So here's my crack at translating female behavior. Let me know if you think i'm wrong.

Sulking/Storming off/ Pouting = generally means you've fucked up, upset me and now I want you to prove how much you care by hugging or kissing me, chasing after me and generally begging for forgiveness.

Pretending to consider your/his friends as potential lovers. Saying you think someone's hot etc = trying to make you jealous. If your girl is trying to make you jealous then I suggest you kiss her senseless and tell her you love her and she's yours. She's TRYING to make you jealous in order to have you reassure her how much you love her.

Not texting for a period of time = She's waiting for you to text her. She's either afraid of coming across as clingy, waiting for you to show her how much you're thinking of her, or frankly can't think of anything interesting to say and is afraid to come across as boring.

Frequently commenting on your fb page, leaving hickeys in visible places, being overly affectionate in front of specific people, = marking her territory. this might sound stupid but if she's overly clingy in front of someone, eg one of her friends what she's really doing is telling them to fuck off coz you're taken. This especially occurs if she (or you) has one of those friends, everyone has one, who knows no boundaries...the boyfriend stealer who does it to feel better about herself.

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